how to stop getting triggered af
Keep reading until the end of the blog post to claim your free 14-day trial of the ultimate Somatic Online Studio to help you build a calm, chill girl nervous system.
Okay, So, you’re out here living your best life when—bam—you’re hit with a sudden emotional reaction to something totally random. Maybe they’re online and not texting you back, or maybe your boss said they want to have a meeting with you. One second, you're cool as a cucumber, and the next, you're ready to fight, flight or flee (or maybe your eyes just start brimming with tears). We’ve all been there. That’s what we call getting “triggered.” Today, we’re breaking down what that ACTUALLY means. And the good news? I’m a sensitive girly here to help you. Not only have I live-streamed my therapy sessions to over 8 million people on my podcast, but now I’m a holistic wellness coach and integrative health practitioner. I get it. I know exactly what’s going on in our psychology, our biology, and more.
So, let’s get into it.
What Is a Trigger?
A trigger is basically anything—a person, situation, or even a smell—that causes an emotional reaction in our body. And here's the kicker: these reactions usually stem from old, unresolved emotional wounds or past trauma. When we’re triggered, our brain reacts as if we’re under attack, even if we’re just, say, scrolling Instagram or sitting in a meeting. It’s a survival mechanism, but in our modern world, it often leaves us feeling overwhelmed, anxious, and way too reactive.
The Trigger Interacts with a part of our brain called the Amygdala
The amygdala is like the brain’s 911 dispatcher—it’s always scanning for danger. Once it senses something's off, it triggers the body’s fight, flight, or freeze response. When your amygdala hijacks your brain, it shuts down your prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain responsible for rational thinking), leaving you spiraling in an emotional meltdown. This is what we call an amygdala hijack—and it’s why you can go from zero to 100 in no time.
And when your nervous system is stuck in fight-or-flight mode, it’s basically like your body forgot how to relax. Instead of bouncing back to a calm state after a stressful event, your body remains on high alert. This dysregulation makes you more sensitive to triggers, turning small annoyances into full-blown crises.
How to Calm Your Triggers
Ready to stop spiraling and start living like the calm, collected goddess you are? Here are the steps to calming your triggers—no therapist required (but hey, they help too).
it’s important to understand there are both in the moent strategies, and longer term strategies too.
‘In the Moment’ Strategies:
These techniques are designed to quickly manage emotional or physical responses when you're feeling triggered or overwhelmed. They help you regain control, calm your nervous system, and ground yourself in the present.
Calm A SENSITIVE Amygdala
Deep Breathing
When you’re in the middle of a trigger, the amygdala (your brain’s fear center) takes over and sends your body into fight-or-flight mode. Deep breathing is one of the quickest ways to calm this response. Try the 4-7-8 breathing technique:Inhale for 4 seconds, filling your lungs.
Hold your breath for 7 seconds, allowing your heart rate to slow.
Exhale for 8 seconds, releasing tension and signaling to your brain that you're safe.
This technique directly engages the parasympathetic nervous system, responsible for helping your body rest and relax, which tells your brain, "We’re okay here."
Somatic Shaking
When stress builds up, it gets stored in the body. Somatic shaking is about physically releasing that built-up tension, so it doesn’t linger and keep you in a heightened state of stress. Try standing up, shaking your arms and legs, and letting your body "shake off" that stress. This movement helps prevent emotions from becoming trapped and festering inside.Grounding Techniques
When anxiety strikes, it’s easy to get lost in your head. Grounding is all about pulling yourself back to the present moment. One easy grounding exercise is the 5-4-3-2-1 method:5 things you can see
4 things you can touch
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
This pulls you out of a triggered state and into the here-and-now, helping shift your focus away from the overwhelming emotions.
Vagus Nerve Stimulation
The vagus nerve plays a critical role in regulating the nervous system. Stimulating it can quickly calm anxiety and bring you back into balance. Here are a few ways to stimulate the vagus nerve:Chest Taps: Lightly tap the center of your chest to stimulate the vagus nerve. This can be especially helpful when anxiety is high.
Humming: The sound vibrations from humming also stimulate the vagus nerve, especially when combined with deep breathing. Try humming a low, continuous note to relax your nervous system.
Humming Breath: Inhale deeply through your nose, and as you exhale, hum gently. This combination of breath and vibration helps to soothe the nervous system.
Let Your Emotions OUT
One of the worst things you can do when you're triggered is to suppress your emotions. Letting them out—whether through talking, writing, or even having a good cry—prevents the emotional tension from building up inside. Think of it like a pressure valve for your mind; when you release the emotion, you release the pressure.Cold Exposure
If you need to calm down fast, cold exposure can work wonders. Splash cold water on your face or take a cold shower to engage the vagus nerve and reset your system. The cold temperature triggers a reflex that helps regulate your nervous system, lowering your heart rate and easing anxiety.
Proactive Regulation Strategies:
While in-the-moment strategies help with immediate reactions, building long-term resilience requires ongoing care of your nervous system. These strategies strengthen your emotional health and help you remain more balanced and grounded so I call them ‘proactive’ regulation strategies. You’re being proactive to build a stronger, more resilient, calmer, more chill nervous system that can handle the stress of being triggered rather than it wiping you out for 24 hours. Here are my top tips on proactive regulation strategies:
Build a Nervous System That Regulates
Consistent practice over time helps your nervous system respond more effectively to stress. The goal is to get your body used to returning to a calm, regulated state after stress or emotional triggers. Building resilience in this area can mean the difference between overreacting and maintaining calm.Daily Practice with Consistency
Just like training for a marathon, emotional regulation takes time and practice. Consistency is key. Incorporating mindfulness, deep breathing, yoga, or meditation into your daily routine strengthens your mind-body connection and makes it easier to manage triggers when they arise.Nurture your Nervous System on a Biological Level
You can’t expect to feel balanced emotionally if your body is out of whack physically. Hydration, balanced blood sugar levels, and the right nutrients all play critical roles in keeping your nervous system calm and functioning optimally (and can make anxiety and depression a lot worse if they are over looked). Here’s how to nurture your body with the foundational basics:Hydration: Make sure you’re drinking enough water throughout the day. Dehydration can lead to headaches, irritability, and heightened stress responses.
Balanced Blood Sugar Levels: Sudden drops in blood sugar (not eating for too long, or eating really high, sugary, processed foods) can increase anxiety and mood swings. Eating balanced meals with proteins, fats, and fiber helps keep your energy stable and help build a more resilient nervous system.
Balanced Neurotransmitters: Your mood is largely governed by neurotransmitters like serotonin and dopamine. These are influenced by what you eat, so making sure you're getting enough nutrients from whole foods (like leafy greens, lean proteins, and omega-3s) can support mental clarity and emotional balance.
Balanced Hormones: Just as your nervous system impacts emotional health, your hormones play a huge role too. Keeping your hormones balanced through a healthy diet and stress management techniques is essential for long-term emotional health.
The Bottom Line: You Can’t Sprint Your Way to Calm
Emotional regulation isn’t a race—it’s a marathon. You can’t expect to master these strategies overnight, but with consistency and daily practice, you’ll start to see real changes in how you respond to stress and emotional triggers. Over time, these proactive strategies will help you build a more resilient, grounded nervous system, and your in-the-moment techniques will become second nature. The key is small, consistent steps that help nurture your body, mind, and nervous system for lasting change.
The good news? My online healing portal can help you with EVERYTHING mentioned in today’s article - somatic shaking, vagus nerve activation, EFT tapping, humming breath and so much more.
INTRODUCING DAILY DEVOTION: 5 minutes of somatics a Day to balance, heal and glow
Stunning video classes expertly created to help you release, regulate, and rewire anxiety, overwhelm and emotional and energetic blocks in just 5 minutes a day.
For less than $2 a day, you’ll gain access to:
Somatic Shaking
Somatic Pilates
EFT Tapping
Breathwork
Soothing Moving (Slow Flow)
Manifestation Meditations
Visualizations / Gratitude Practices
Somatic Experiencing
Plus
Two live sessions per month to connect and grow with a supportive community.
A community room filled with like-minded individuals on their healing journeys.
20+ hours of bonus podcasts to deepen your understanding and practice.
